This episode is probably my favorite. Hilarious.
Every day I cry a little less …I can foresee myself eventually being at peace with my decision and no longer being sad. A few months ago I would never have had the clarity to see that things would get better. Then again, a few months ago I was desperately hanging on to a relationship that I knew wasn’t right but couldn’t stand to lose the only thing I was hanging on to.
I got the closure I needed and now… Time to move on. I’m always going to love him, until the end of time, but he finally manned up and said he didn’t love me. I can’t imagine how difficult it must be to tell someone you don’t love them. Not that that excuses him from the shitty way he went about this. And it definitely doesn’t excuse all the behavior from before but, I don’t know. I almost feel bad for his sorry ass. Because a) he lost me and I’m the best thing that could have ever happened to him. (Omg jokes, settle down) b) he just believes he is incapable of loving someone (and I thought I was fucked up.) All I needed was to here him say he didn’t love me and then it was like “well if he hasn’t fallen for me after this long he’s never going to love me.” I kept trying to pull him closer and I think ultimately that drove him to be a fucking douche kabob. Not that that excuses him from being one. I will always remember the moment I fell in love with him and I’ll always keep those feelings of the love I felt for him over the years… But it’s time to move on. I deserve to love someone who loves me back.
Ugh, way to get all mushy and personal on a public forum. Sorry.
I’m going to have to say that drunk me trying to understand and use snap chat for the first time is up there among the funniest things in recent history.
So, to elaborate on my previous post, I’ve come a long way. I lost 80 pounds (gained back 7, lost 3 so I guess only 75ish), I quit drinking 3/4 of a bottle of liquor almost every night, I got myself to a position at my job that I actually like, I learned how to stick up for myself, I moved into my own place for the first time, and I pulled myself out of a double depression with the help of doctors and pills …but still. I also told the dude to step up or step out. (He chose step out…fuuuck that.) This has all happened within the last year. I’m also redecorating and trying to make a life here for the time being. There have been panic attacks and mental breakdowns along the way but I’m still here and I’m ready to move on. I still wish I had more support but…I have myself for now.